Man abandoned as newborn says ’emptiness has disappeared’ after meeting half-sisters

A man who was abandoned in a plastic bag as a newborn has been reunited with members of his birth family on the UK reality television show, “Long Lost Family.”

Key Takeaways:

• Jon Scarlett-Phillips was abandoned in a public bathroom as a newborn.

• After years of wondering, he reached out to the UK show “Long Lost Family,” whose producers located his birth mother and half-sisters.

• Every U.S. state has Safe Haven law to prevent dangerous child abandonment.

The Details:

Forty-year-old Jon Scarlett-Phillips was featured on the UK reality show Long Lost Family on June 25, where viewers watched him reunite with members of his birth family — the half-sisters he never knew he had. He had been abandoned as a newborn in 1984 and then was adopted.

According to The Daily Mail, it was in September 1984 that teenage girls found a baby in the bathroom of a swimming pool parking lot. He was wrapped in a blanket inside a plastic bag with the placenta still attached. The teenage girls saved him, calling police and an ambulance.

“I was found by three girls,” Scarlett-Phillips said. “I’m grateful, very grateful that they heard me and found me. They’re the ones that saved my life.”

Scarlett-Phillips was adopted, and for years he didn’t want to search for his biological family. He said he always knew he was abandoned and struggled with questions as to why. This led to feelings of anger before he ultimately made the difficult decision to search for his birth mother.

“I didn’t want to search for a very long time,” he said. “It’s hard, it’s hard to deal with. The question is still there: ‘Why did she do it?'”

Meeting his half-sisters

The television show was not able to reunite Scarlett-Phillips with his birth mother in person, but he was able to meet his half-sisters, who wrote him a letter:

To our long lost brother Jon. We are writing this letter to express to you how delighted we are to learn that [we] have a brother.

Finding out about you has been a complete rollercoaster of emotions. Initially, we were heartbroken and devastated to find out how many years we had missed together.

However, as emotions settled, we were left with such happiness. We realise that learning about us today will be a shock to you, but we want you to know that you have a family, and we will try and help you piece everything together as much as we can.

After reading the letter, Scarlett-Phillips became emotional. “Wow,” he said, “that’s amazing. It’s a whirl of emotions. It’s like a tornado going off at the moment.”

His mother’s story

After meeting his sisters, they told him that his mother was 20 years old when she gave birth to him and that her marriage had recently ended. With two young daughters at home, she didn’t feel she could care for him.

“I suspect she surprisingly found herself pregnant with Jon, and I think she couldn’t cope. When she left him, she was mentally in a very bad place,” said “Long Lost Family” host Ariel Bruce, who learned that his mother is still alive. However, Scarlett-Phillips’ half-sister said their mother is suffering with a long-term illness.

She did send him a message, which stated:

Hi, I’ve sent this message to the girls so they can let you know the reasons why I’m not with them today. Unfortunately, I feel unable, both physically and mentally, to come today following a long period of illness.

She also said she deals with guilt and shame and needs to process more before meeting him in person.

Resolution

Despite not getting to meet his birth mother, he was happy to meet his half-sisters, whose faces and names were protected. One of them told him, “We’ve always wanted a brother.”

“Well you’ve now got one,” he said, “and I’m not going anywhere.”

Scarlett-Phillips says he doesn’t hold a grudge towards his birth mother. “I feel a lot lighter. I feel a bit more full, as well,” he said. “That emptiness has disappeared completely now. I’m a happy man.”

The Bottom Line:

While not every story has a happy ending, many people find great value in knowing where they came from — their families of origin — even if the truth is painful.

Whether abandoned at birth as Scarlett-Phillips was, or placed in an adoptive family, or conceived via reproductive technology using donor cells, knowing one’s biological origins can help to put in place more pieces to complete the puzzle about who a person is and where he or she came from.

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